Frequently Asking Questions (FAQs)
Find answers to the most common questions about Spare Thoughts. If you can’t find what you’re looking for here, it might be something you shouldn’t know. But feel free to ask us anyway.
Spare Thoughts is a collection of shirts, designs, and other assorted nonsense inspired by the weird, funny, irritating, and occasionally profound things that happen when people are left alone with their thoughts.
Some ideas are observations. Some are complaints. Some are jokes that probably should have stayed in my head. I put them on things.
Mostly from paying attention when I probably shouldn’t.
A conversation overheard in public. A bizarre habit someone has. A phrase that shouldn’t be as funny as it is. A tiny everyday annoyance that somehow becomes a full-blown concept.
Spare Thoughts are the thoughts that show up when your brain has finished handling the important stuff and starts wandering around the neighborhood.
Yes.
There is a human behind the questionable decisions, irreverent humor, and inexplicable amount of time spent thinking about things that nobody asked me to think about.
Some tools may assist with the process, but the ideas, concepts, editing, and final creative decisions come from a human brain. The brain may be defective. But it’s mine.
Mostly things you can wear, display, give to someone you like, give to someone you used to like, or buy because a particular design accurately describes your current level of emotional stability.
My lineup may include T-shirts and other products featuring Spare Thoughts designs. New ideas get added as they escape containment.
Check the size chart on the product page before ordering. Different garments can have different fits, so don’t assume your usual size will behave itself.
If you’re between sizes, pay attention to the measurements rather than trusting the tiny voice in your head saying, “Medium will be fine.” That voice has lied before.
Many Spare Thoughts products are produced and fulfilled by my production partner rather than sitting in a warehouse waiting for someone to order them.
That means your item is generally made specifically for your order, then packaged and shipped to you. In other words, I’m not sitting in a dark room surrounded by 400 T-shirts waiting for your credit card number.
Processing and shipping times can vary depending on the product, destination, and carrier. You’ll receive the applicable order and shipping information after your purchase.
Please allow a little extra time during holidays, major sales, carrier delays, or other situations where the universe decides that your shirt can wait. If your tracking information hasn’t moved in an unusually long time, contact me, and I’ll help figure out what happened.
Return and exchange eligibility depends on the product and the reason for the return, so check the applicable return policy before sending anything back.
Because many products are made specifically for each order, some items may not be eligible for returns simply because you changed your mind.
Please don’t order three sizes with the intention of returning two unless the product’s return policy specifically allows it. I appreciate your cooperation, and so does the small army of people who would otherwise have to process those returns.
Maybe. Spare Thoughts is primarily about my own strange collection of observations, but I’m always interested in hearing a good idea.
If you’ve got something that makes you think, “Someone needs to put this on a shirt,” there’s a reasonable chance I understand exactly what you mean.
You can contact me with your idea. No promises, no guarantees, and absolutely no compensation for the million-dollar idea you are certain I stole from you after reading your email.
Ask it. If you couldn’t find the answer here, there’s no need to wander aimlessly through the internet like a confused raccoon. Get in touch through my contact page and tell me what’s on your mind. I’ll do my best to help.
And if the question is “Why would anyone put that on a shirt?” Honestly, that’s probably a better question for the person who bought it.